Sometimes Even When You're Right - You're Wrong

Today is my mother's birthday. She lives in a different state (I won't even touch that one) - I mean State, so I plan very thoroughly to get her birthday gift and card to her on the right day. I was feeling pretty proud of myself this morning knowing her card was on time. I dialed their number and when my mother answered, I cheerfully chirped "Happy Birthday, Mum". To which she responded "Today isn't my birthday". I quickly looked at my calendar, my birthday book and today's date and all the stars lined up - it was her birthday. But, I was a bit puzzled and wanted to hear her explanation, so I responded "What do you mean, today isn't your birthday. This has always been your birthday. I always remember because your birthday is the day before April Fool's Day."

As if talking to a small child who doesn't understand long sentences, she emphasized "Today is not my birthday. My birthday was yesterday". I could feel myself starting to use the "argument tone" but stopped and quietly said "really? When did that happen"? Now, my mother is in her 80's and I've never had to erase her birthday date in all of those years. I mean, I was pretty confident I could write it in ink in my birthday book. Now, I'm questioning myself. My mother continued "My birthday has always been on the 30th. It's on my birth certificate. The doctor or my mother made a mistake when they filled out the birth certificate. I was born on the 31st but they wrote the 30th on the certificate." OK, I'm thinking, her birthday is on the 31st but I decided to hear her out. "So, why have we always celebrated on the 31st - until now?". "Oh, what's a day difference make"? (It now makes me a day late in calling her to wish her a happy birthday, that's what a day's difference makes!)

My mother went on to say that when she applied for Social Security (almost 20 years ago) they wouldn't pay any of her bills until she said she was born on the 30th, which is the date on her birth certificate. I'm still confused because I have talked to my mother a few times over the past 20 years and I would have thought that this would have come up in the conversation - but no, not once.

I continued small talking with her while I rummaged through my desk looking for the white out when she hit me with another zinger. "And your sister's birthday isn't the 15th, it's the 16th. " (what in the heck??) "There was a mistake on the date on her birth certificate, too. She was born on the 15th, but they wrote the 16th and I never changed it". "So, does my sister know this"? I wondered aloud. I think my mother responded "ah huh" so I'm assuming she did.

What is with my family? If they had gotten their horoscopes done they would have been making all of the wrong decisions all of their lives. And when am I supposed to call to wish them a happy birthday? Should I call 2 days in a row so I hit the right one? Why did it take so long for me to find this out? I believe I'm in the only family that has been celebrating 2 people's birthdays on the wrong day for their whole lives.

I need to find my birth certificate!